My oldest son was given an incredible opportunity this week.  His coach nominated him to tryout for a lacrosse team that will travel to New York in June and compete against other cities in a national championship.  There were sixty boys nominated for the opportunity to try out.  The team will consist of twenty-two boys.  Watching your child put his heart, sweat and ego on the line because he REALLY wants something is even more unbearable than trying on a bikini under fluorescent lights.  

We watched the tryout yesterday in a state of panic and pride.  What if he doesn’t make it?  What if I have to say, you just weren’t good enough.  We had to give him that bad news last year after a tryout and let me tell you I am still trying to find out where that coach lives.  Eggs and toilet paper can solve just about anything. 

I believe my husband and I to be fairly sane people.  Actually he is really sane and I fall somewhere just short.   On Saturday at the tryouts the two of us completely lost our minds.  The stress of it all got to us and we behaved like a couple of those crazy parents you read about in the paper. 

If someone had videotaped us it would be an instant success on Youtube.  Shoulders pulled tightly up to my earlobes, I was flinching this way and that with KeenanKeenan aka: Kman
Age: 14
"Special" Qualities: Door slamming, stomping and eye rolling (can do it all in one impressive motion).
Best Qualities: The softest kindest heart, hysterical and quite charming when he tries.’s every move.  Upon realizing my ridiculous behavior, stopped, only minutes later to find myself doing the same.  I was panicked when he made the smallest mistake and had to refrain from doing a toe touch and screaming out “Wooooooo.  Nice Job Kman!” every time he did something great.  

We would watch the coach each time Keenan touched the ball and say things like, “Coach Red wasn’t looking.  Coach Yellow Shirt wrote something down.  Crap, Coach Bald saw that mistake.”  At one point we tried to strategize how we could make a certain noise so that the coaches would look up every time Keenan had the ball.  During one drill Keenan made a particularly good move on a kid and left him in the dust.  My husband said way too loudly, “Bye bye”.  We were a grease fire.

We got into a fight as well, because what good parents don’t fight at their kids tryouts?  JJJJ aka: Depends on my mood.
What I love:He looks good in a cowboy hat or a business suit and wears them both daily. But not together, that would be creepy.
Hobbies: Building furniture, remodeling homes, playing sports with our kids, laughing with me. Seriously. was frustrated that Keenan wasn’t running to the front of the line for all the drills.  He was constantly huffing and groaning.  I am talking every couple of seconds, for two hours.  I should also point out that with every groan there was a head being thrown back in such a dramatic fashion that it would have made even Keenan proud.  When I told him he was making me a nervous wreck he stomped off with a groan and a throwback of the head.

As it turns out, Keenan made the first cut. We then embarrassed ourselves through one more tryout and are now awaiting Keenan’s fate.  Meanwhile JJ and I are actively seeking tryout training and welcome any recommendations you might have.