Sara’s head was throbbing and her mouth was so dry it felt like someone had used a leaf blower to clean it out. She was desperate for some ibuprofen and water but was afraid if she moved, even a millimeter, she would awaken the person lying next to her. Until she figured out who it was, that was not an option. 

The morning sun hadn’t come up yet and the room was pitch black. She tried to piece together what had happened the night before. 

“Think,” Sara mouthed, “think.”

Slowly, the images from the previous night started to flood her mind.

“Hi, aren’t you Cooper’s mom?” she heard someone yell over the music.

Coopers mom, she thought? What could be worse than being in a bar and being referred to as “Coopers mom”?

She turned to see a familiar face but in this setting she couldn’t place it. Was it one of the dad’s from Coop’s new soccer team? She smiled and nodded her head, her expression one of recognition though she was desperately trying to put a face with a name.

Not fooled by the look on her face, he shouted, “I’m Adam. I’m Cooper’s English teacher.”

Oh good, Sara thought. I am in a bar, dressed like a slut, two cocktails in and my teenage son’s teacher is here. SWEET.

Trying to turn in such a way that her pushed up, overexposed breasts weren’t shoved in his face, she smiled uncomfortably and said loudly, “Oh. Hi. Yes. Of course. Wow. It’s great to see you....here...in a bar.”

Adam could tell she was uncomfortable. He was used to the parents’ of his students responding with disdain at running into him. This was an escape from their home life and he was an intrusion, ants at their picnic. It annoyed him.  Just because he taught their kids didn’t mean he wasn’t cool enough to mingle in the same places. Was he supposed to just stay at home and watch t.v. on Saturday nights?

He smiled and said in an annoyed tone, “Yeah. Well. Great to see you. I am off to the bar,” he raised his full glass and said, “Need a refill.”

“Ok. Good seeing you,” Sara said. She gave a little wave and exhaled as she dropped her forehead into her open hand.

Beth and Carrie showed up at just that moment.  “WHO is the hottie?” asked Beth, "And why did you let him walk off?"

“THAT. Is Cooper’s teacher and I would like to go now,” Sara responded as she hastily gathered her purse and jacket. Why had she let them talk her into coming? She HATED the bar scene. So what if she hadn’t been on a date since before the straight iron was invented. This was not her scene and now Cooper’s teacher was here and she was getting the hell out before she ran into his damn soccer coach too.

“Whoa. Slow down now sweetie. You aren't doin’ nothin’ wrong by bein’ in a bar.” Carrie said with her usual lack of g's that drove Sara crazy. Carrie looked down at Sara’s cleavage, then added, “Even if your tits are hangin’ out.”

Carrie and Beth both chuckled at the mortified look on Sara’s face.

“That’s it. I am SO out of here,” Sara said. She turned to leave and slammed right into Adam who had walked back over to where the girls were standing.

“Sorry,” she said, pulling her coat up over her chest. Please GOD just get me out of here. I promise I will go to church tomorrow. PROMISE.

She continued apologizing as she tried to step around him, “I’m so sorry. I was just trying to leave and..."

He stepped in front of her, ignoring the fact that she was holding the coat over her boobs and that both of her girlfriends had moved in close with wicked smiles glued to their faces, and he unloaded, “What is the deal with this parental fear of teachers thing? Is it because you think we are all goody two-shoes? That all of our homes are lined in books and we just sit at home and watch the Discovery channel? Is it because you think I am going to go to school tomorrow and say, ‘Hey Coop, saw your mom last night at a bar and she was clearly drunk and WOW does she have some NICE honkers?’”

Flabbergasted she cut him off, “I am NOT drunk. I've only had two drinks and they were small.” She stared at him in disbelief and then added, “Did you say honkers? Seriously? HONKERS?”

Adam smiled at the look on her face. “Yes. I believe I did say honkers,” he said.

His smile was quite disarming and in spite of herself she suddenly had the desire to smile back. 

He extended his hand and said, “Let's try this again. Hi. I am Adam and I would appreciate not being known as Cooper’s teacher this evening.”

Still smiling she took his hand and said, “Hi. I am Sara and I would like to not be known as Cooper’s mom this evening.”

The person lying next to Sara twitched and rolled over almost causing her to gasp out loud. Oh God, Sara thought as she lay there, that is Cooper's teacher.